Christmas is almost here, racing down upon us like an out-of-control train. Within 24 hours, our children will be twitching masses of excitement, dying to unwrap mysterious packages under the tree. Empty packaging will soon be strewn around the room, as I unloose the bonds that hold tiny toys, freeing dolls and their °ßaccessories°® from plastic prisons.

But for myself, I am praying for healing.

Since arriving in the US, I have had numerous fevers and fleeting bouts of illnesses. I have often fallen ill with the I-really-need-that fever, usually in a tech store. I have experienced the pangs of the everybody-else-has-one flu. Sometimes I can feel it deep in my heart, the throbbing pain of why-can°¶t-I-have-that, and the corresponding realization that my desired cure (to have it) will never come!

These illnesses have hit me in small ways, while looking at a 20-inch IMac computer, Macbook laptop, or a video IPod. I have fallen ill while wishing for the money to go Dall sheep or caribou hunting. I was sick with the fever while dreaming for a 3000-acre ranch in Montana and a matching luxurious log home, wondering why I couldn°¶t have one!

I have always faced small bouts of these sicknesses, even as a child. Paging through a Sears toy catalog probably infected me when I was too small to have immunities. Age has only brought greater dissonance, as the gap between reality and dream has grown.

I have struggled more with these illnesses since coming back to the States. I see the incredible houses ordinary people own, and I wonder how I could afford one. I witness the money spent on fun and I wonder, °ßWhy can°¶t I do that?°® I see land values rising and I wish I had a mere thousand acres!

While in Moldova, the fever never flares up like it does here. Materialism definitely exists among Moldovans, but we live with people who have so little that I usually do not see what I am missing.

So I am praying this year for God°¶s healing. When the I-wish-I-had fever strikes, I want the contentment that comes from God. When I-REALLY-want flu hits or the I-NEED-one-of-those measles strikes, I want come back to what I REALLY need.

For when the fever has passed, I realize what I really DO want. I want the same as the Apostle Paul—to know Him, and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His suffering, and to somehow become like Christ. Things are not necessarily wrong or evil. They just pale in comparison to knowing Christ and seeing His grace and mercy change Moldova. That is my ultimate Christmas wish list.

With the continual bombardment of advertising, never-ending sales and a culture that says, °ßspend, spend, spend,°® avoiding the fever is as likely as avoiding a yearly cold. But when it strikes, I am going to practice the habit or reordering my wish list.

May all your deepest Christmas wishes be fulfilled.

Your Christmas-loving missionary,
Andy Raatz

PS: If you are interested in making an end-of-the-year donation to the work in Moldova, whether to help with the Home of Hope, Teen Challenge or church planting, please make sure it is post-marked by Dec 31. We appreciate all that you have done, your support both past and future, and your faithful prayers.